I was genuinely excited for last night’s show. Was I exhausted? Of course. I’m on a bit of a bender with no end in sight and, like usual, housework is piling up with no time to get it all done. That being said, after meeting a friend for dinner and some margaritas before the show, I was more than prepared for what the night was going to bring. I was ready to see one of my favorite jokester bands- Steel Panther and my hometown hero that I used to worship as a child- Corey Taylor and Stone Sour. I walked into The Myth bright eyed and bushy tailed but as the lights went down and the show started, everything changed.

As far as I knew, there were only two acts on the bill as that’s how the show was promoted. What I didn’t know was that there was a dance troupe that would be opening the show. Just a heads up– I’m using the term “dance troupe” loosely here. I’m all for the talent that it takes to dance and, when the aerialists took flight during the set, I was more than mesmerized by their strength and beauty but that’s where my amazement stopped and disgust set in. Here I was at, what I assumed would be, a concert watching dancers (although adult entertainers may be a more fitting description) prance around the stage with barely any clothes on while the male dominated crowd drooled like a bunch of idiots. Sure, the girls were gorgeous and, as I said, talented, but I was out last night for a concert– not a strip tease.

I’ve never quite understood the reason stuff like this is so popular in the metal scene. The only reason I can think of is because it’s such a male dominated genre. Regardless, I was hating what I was watching and hated the guys surrounding me making snide comments to their buddies about the dancers. I was utterly disgusted. Had I known there was an opening “act” like this, I would have had one more margarita and just showed up late because I know things like this make me uncomfortable and get me all fired up. Unfortunately, since they weren’t listed on any of the information I found, there I was watching this shit show unfold in front of my eyes. Again, I would like to reiterate– I recognize the talent and strength that these girls have. That being said, last night- an all ages concert- was not the time or place for this.

As I recovered from what I just saw, the stage was turned over for Steel Panther- a glam metal band that I’ve become quite fond of having seen them a couple of times now. The four members of Steel Panther all have larger than life personalities that are exaggerated ideas of what a 80’s glam metal band would be like. With “the pretty one” (Lexxi Foxx) constantly checking in his hand mirror to fix his hair and make up and womanizer singer Michael Starr, Steel Panther’s live show is one that always has me laughing to the point where it hurts. Their shtick seems a bit rehearsed but that doesn’t take away from the way that all of the members have personalities that shine brighter than the glittery scarves that dangled from their skin-tight pants.

The last time I saw Steel Panther, I definitely saw my share of sloppy, topless girls including a couple that were brought onto stage. I wasn’t completely okay with it but it kind of went with this whole over the top glam metal thing and, instead of coming off as over sexualized, it felt funny and just the way the show should go. I don’t know what changed last night but I’m going to attribute my attitude towards Steel Panther’s set to my annoyance levels that were already through the roof. When they started to bring girls up on stage (as they always do) I realized that majority (but not all) seemed to be channeling their inner Cherry Bomb and making complete fools of themselves. I almost felt bad for the drunk ones on stage that probably woke up this morning with no clue that they showed a nearly sold out Myth their bare chests or had other girls lifting their dresses up to show the crowd their asses. Who am I to judge though– clearly I just don’t get how rock & roll works these days.

I was ready to leave. I was over the show. I honestly didn’t want to be there anymore and regretted showing up at all. That being said, I had committed to covering the night and there was one band left. I probably could have forgotten what had happened in the past couple of hours and went into Stone Sour’s set with a clear mind but I was just so turned off from the show so far and so exhausted that Stone Sour had a lot to make up for.

Stone Sour is fronted by Corey Taylor of Slipknot. For those of you who have been living under a rock, Slipknot is from Iowa making Corey Taylor a true hometown hero for me. He was my idol for so many reasons including him getting the hell out of Iowa while never forgetting where his roots are. I remember the times when I was in my early teens and he would walk into the record shop I was working at. He always had a smile on his face and a personality that could light up the darkest room. I was always much more of a Slipknot fan than any other side project that the nine men in that band started. I loved the brutality and intensity of it. Unfortunately, Slipknot wasn’t in town last night, Stone Sour was, and that’s as close as I was going to get to curing some of the homesickness I have going on right now. As soon as the band hit the stage and I saw the familiar face of Corey Taylor, I felt a sense of comfort that I didn’t know I needed.

I will say that it was a little odd to see Corey Taylor– the singer of Slipknot– shooting colorful confetti at the crowd but it definitely put a smile on my face. Throughout Stone Sour’s fourteen song set and three song encore, there was a sense of energy and intensity that only Corey and his friends can bring to the table. The music of Stone Sour may be waves calmer than that of Slipknot and the look may be a immensely less sinister but that didn’t stop Stone Sour’s show from bring explosive and powerful. Drummer Roy Mayorga blasted through the songs with power and clarity while the other four members stormed across the stage throughout the set. Now, this is what I had signed up for. This was a rock show. This was a concert.

With an undeniable sense of passion and emotion radiating off the stage, I was more than happy with my decision to stick it out through the bullshit at the beginning of last night’s show. I watched from the back as the crowd pushed and shoved their way into a sweaty mosh pit while the lights flashed and spiraled out of control. Unfortunately, knowing that my way home was closed due to construction and I would have to get creative with my route which would undeniably add a half hour to my drive, and the exhaustion I was feeling on top of that, I headed out a little bit early. I wasn’t happy with the way my night had gone but, I can’t deny that Stone Sour definitely turned it around.

Last night could have been another amazing show in a string of next to perfect shows but it wasn’t. Unfortunately, the metal/ heavy rock scene had to show it’s ugly misogynistic side that I try to ignore. There was no ignoring it last night and it made me sick. Thankfully, Stone Sour came to the rescue and, not only restored my faith in the music scene I call home, but also cured my homesickness a little bit. Not every show can be a winner but, just because it’s not a winner doesn’t mean it has to be a complete loss.

I’ll never stop going to shows bright eyed and bushy tailed no matter how many times I get let down.

Line Up:

The Cherry Bombs

Steel Panther

Stone Sour

Venue: The Myth

Sausage Fest Meter- 32 out of 10

Average Age of the Crowd- 34

Crowd Surfers- Only saw 1 before I moved to the back

Stage Divers-  0

Broken Bones- 0

Spotted Flying Through The Air- Condoms, Beer

Fights-0

Pukers- 0

Celebrity Sightings- None

Overall Score- 3 out of 10

Show on Deck- Frightened Rabbit/ Broken Social Scene